Today I was on the phone with the city manager of Burbank and he told me there was a bomb scare at City Hall. Mind you, City Hall is pretty much across the street from my office. So to my mind, if there’s a bomb scare at City Hall, there’s a bomb scare at my office. But because he said “bomb scare” rather than just “bomb,” I felt secure in leaving out the scared part too, assuming aloud that it was a prank or a screw-up.
“No, it’s real,” he said. That caught my attention.
And indeed, it was real. Here’s what happened: a city employee who works at the jail had a World War II large-caliber ammunition round laying around and wasn’t sure if it was still armed. So here’s what he did: He drove it to the jail, which is behind City Hall, and asked others what they thought. Seeing large undetonated ammunition from the days before Eisenhower was president, they did what we all would do: freak out momentarily, then call the bomb squad. Ultimately, it was decided that the device was inert and nothing exploded, accidentally or intentionally.
Note to anyone reading this: If you have large undetonated ammunition, or mines, or grenades, really any sort of explosive device, and especially leaking sticks of dynamite, do not drive it to City Hall environs and show it around for an opinion. Leave it where it is and then call in others to consult about it right where it is.
Last weekend, my son came home from college to take his girlfriend to her senior prom. (She is just under one year younger.) He shaved his “beard” off (I apply the quotes to keep him humble), got a haircut, and got fitted for a tux. By the end stage of his makeover, I have to admit, I was impressed. While I’m admittedly biased — and not always in the favor of my children — I had to look at him, and at the photos that followed of he with his attractive girlfriend on his arm, and estimate aloud that he could be a model. (Except that he does things like read Kierkegaard. That might get in the way.)
In the last 24 hours, I got a haircut, I got my back cracked by a chiropractor, I got a dental cleaning, and tomorrow I’m entering the early stages of some cosmetic dental work. Now I feel like I’m getting ready for a prom. Except there’s no hope of being a model. Every time I buy hair product, I’m just glad there’s still hair that needs it.
I added up the number of emails I get on an average day, and here’s the total: 15 kajillion. I know, that’s less than I thought, too. But still, it’s too much for me to handle. Most of them don’t present a problem — I quickly scan and delete. It’s the ones that seem to, well, hang around awaiting action — either my needing additional information, or my needing the time to deal with the specifics of the matter — that fill up my box. The latter includes any number of points of discussion with friends near and far. I have a friend who thinks that Apple is now dominating because it has moved into the “toy” business; just as soon as I get the time, he’s going to get my lengthy reply about what I’m calling Apple’s new “appliance” model. There’s also the email offering downloads of photos taken of me crossing the finish line during the marathon in Amsterdam in 2008 (yes, I must click and order those), and the sound file from three years ago of my friend Joe wishing my daughter Emma well, and the link to photos of the Moving Arts 15th anniversary celebrity reading of two of my plays. You see how things sometimes… pile up.
But now I’ve discovered this new system. So far, so good. My actual email in box is now empty, my “to do” is manageable, and all those other things are tucked in places where I can still safely procrastinate. Looking at my clean in box summons the feeling that many a 50’s housewife had when she’d mopped without leaving yellow waxy buildup. And so, I share it with you. Here it is.
That’s a lot better than just two months ago. At that time, only 16 metro areas in the U.S. showed job growth — a list headed by my old hometown of Ocean City, NJ. Except, when I lived there, it was not a “metro area.” Anytime Ocean City leads the nation in economic growth, you know it’s not good. One winter night a friend and I drove over the bridge to buy beer, thereby cutting in half the winter population of Ocean City, NJ.
I just came across this news feature on my friend Trey’s Facebook page. It seems that as a third-grade teacher in 1961, his mother gave some memorable encouragement to a student writer. That writer has now written more than 100 children’s books and, now, a book of poems. Here’s the story.
Last night was the latest night of readings from my playwriting workshop. One of the three playwrights has become an accomplished award-winning, produced, published playwright. (I think she and I will always remember the moment we jointly realized in my class that yes, she was a playwright. I could suddenly see it, and so could she.) One of the other playwrights last night has been in my workshop for a while. She joined the workshop to start writing plays — to learn how to write plays — and now here she was, the first act of her first play finally completed, playing out for a full house at the Inside the Ford space at the John Anson Ford Amphitheatre. She had one of those rare debut achievements: the audience laughed in all the right places, and at least two of them cried in the right places. The joy written on this new playwright’s face afterward will stay with me for a long time.
I salute my friend’s mother. And I salute all the people who continue on with whatever sort of endeavor despite all the setbacks and discouragements the world can sling at them.
One thing you can say about California politics: We get lots of great video spots. This one amuses me greatly. (Although the notion of Senator Fiorina does not.)
I’ve read many Founding Fathers biographies. Still, I learned a great deal about George Washington from this one. Much of this stuff should give the Tea Partiers pause.
Just like Christmas, Free Comic Book Day is a day that the kid inside us wishes came every day.
Click here to locate your nearest participating comics shop — and the list of free comics. And then do what I’m going to do: Round up some kids — actual kids — and take them to a comics shop. Last year was a highly memorable occasion: My daughter got to meet “Supergirl” and “Wonder Woman,” and got a sketch from a professional artist. That sketch still hangs in her room, and the memory of “Supergirl” and “Wonder Woman” lingers in my memory.