My hatred for AT&T isn’t a new thing. But they continue to invent new ways to be infuriating.

About a month ago, they summarily shut off our Internet at my company. When one of the staff called to try to get this resolved, they wouldn’t speak with her because she wasn’t me — and given that I was out, I guess they just figured we could do without Internet service until I was somehow reachable. (And doing without connectivity shouldn’t be a problem for a digital marketing firm that does all its business via the Internet, I guess.) My partner was finally able to talk them into talking to her. They claimed we hadn’t paid the bill, so she put it on a credit card and we got service restored. Needless to say, when I got in I ran a report that showed that we had indeed paid the bill, and they had cashed the check. So I got on the phone and switched everything here over to Charter — our landlines and our Internet; absolutely everything except my iPhone — and canceled AT&T. Net gain:  Internet service that is six times faster, a savings of $190 per month, and no more dealing with AT&T.

I should also add at this point that I sit on a board with an executive from AT&T. When I, or anyone else, describes our problems with AT&T, here’s what he says:  “I know.” Sometimes he adds, “I know” again, so it’s “I know, I know.” As little as that is (i.e., it’s nothing), it’s more than AT&T has ever done for me; they don’t even seem to know.

So I just came into my office today (Saturday) for a half day and found a delightful little notice from AT&T. They’re saying we owe them another $10.65. I just checked online with our bank:  We don’t. AT&T cashed our final check, and by the way, that final check was for an amount they prorated (because I canceled mid-month) to about $192. So, in other words, not only do we not owe them $10.65, by their accounting, they would now owe us $182. And I want it. Boy, do I want it. I live to see a check coming back from AT&T.

So I did what the letter instructed me to do:  call them, Monday – Friday 8 a.m. to 6 p.m., or Saturdays 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Well, it’s Saturday. So I figured I’d save myself or my assistant some time, and I just called them. Here’s the net result:  four minutes of wending my way through their automated phone tree. Then, after it promised to connect me with a billing agent who could resolve this, it announced that all lines were busy and I should call back another time. And it disconnected me. So now my assistant will be calling them on Monday, because no way I’m going through this again.

I thought I’d end by leaving  you with some AT&T marketing slogans that to me seem straight from Jonathan Swift in their irony:

“Fits you best.”

“Raising the bar.”

“Rethink possible.”

I especially like the last one. Because if you think something is possible for AT&T, you’d better rethink.

This entry was posted on Saturday, June 22nd, 2013 at 1:41 pm and is filed under Thoughts. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.