Guessing game
Earlier this week, my friend-since-college Paul alerted me that he’d shipped a gift from the wilds of New Jersey I once haunted. All week long, via emails and text messages, we’ve played a guessing game that went just like this:
Me: “Animal, vegetable, or mineral?”
Him: “No hints. You’ll have to wait until Friday.”
Me (not known for my patience, and channeling Peggy Cass): “Is it bigger than a bread box?”
Him: “Yes, it is bigger than a bread box.” (So much for “No hints.”)
Me: “Is it heavier than a chicken?”
Him: “No more hints, it will ruin the surprise. You’ll just have to curb your curiosity for a few days. (If that’s possible.)”
Me: “Is it perishable?”
Him (unable again to keep to his pledge of “no hints”): “It could last several years.”
Me: “Is it cremains of Joe’s old clients?” (We have a mutual friend who went out of the funeral business. We sometimes speculate about, um, lasting obligations.)
Him (still, you’ll note, giving hints): “No. You might be able to guess one item in the box but not the other. I’m going to sleep now, so more info tonight.” (I think he meant no more info tonight, but that didn’t daunt me.)
Me (emailing back immediately): “Is it something one might use in the home?”
Him: “It could be used in or outside the house.”
Me: “Is it a chainsaw, or a pound of twenty dollar bills?” (Both of which I could use inside or outside the house, the latter to bribe small children. The former, according to many low-budget films produced since the 1970’s, to dispense with small children.)
I received no reply to that one. I started to think: Maybe I guessed right. Maybe it is a pound of twenties. Which would be useful. (I already have a chainsaw.)
Then, on Friday, I got this email: “So did the package I sent arrive?”
And here was my reply: “Dunno. I’m out of town on biz ’til Monday.”
The smoke I smelled while driving down to Palm Springs was coming out of Paul’s ears.
November 16th, 2009 at 5:21 am
Give me a hard time and see if I send anything else!
The gap in comments on Thirsday occured because I was rather busy at work.
November 19th, 2009 at 5:15 pm
Of course, the ‘bigger than a breadbox’ question was originated by Steve Allen in the early 50s on the TV show “What’s My Line?” He also wrote a book titled BIGGER THAN A BREADBOX.
November 20th, 2009 at 11:10 am
You are correct. But I wasn’t watching it in the 1950s; by the time I was watching it, it was the 1960s (or later!), so I guess I associate it with Peggy Cass.