Lee Wochner: Writer. Director. Writing instructor. Thinker about things.


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Annals of travel

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I ask you:  What exactly is this thing for?

I’m staying in a rather nice hotel in a very nice area of Chicago — Lakeshore Drive, in Magnificent Mile — and am confronted, as one generally is in such a place, with this pillow log.

It is too stiff to function as a headrest.

It is too long to fold into a headrest.

It is too narrow and, again, immaleable, to serve as a body pillow. (If one were the type to use body pillows.)

So what is its purpose?

I consulted Mr. Google, who yielded this listing on, of course, Amazon, where one may buy varieties of this trunk of pillow. You will note that it is listed as a Marriott Hotel Decorative Bolster Pillow. (The accent on “decorative” is mine.)

So this thing is pure decoration. Because, lord knows, to the consumer, it’s useless.

But I think it has one other function. Its presence helps to justify the price of the fancy-schmantzy hotel. When you check into your room and see the decorative bolster pillow, you realize, “Hey! There’s a Decorative Bolster Pillow on the bed! Of course! Now I know why this room costs six times as much as Motel 6!”

(Well, that, plus the clean sheets. And the lack of toenail clippings on the floor.)

I will not be buying a Decorative Bolster Pillow for my home. Because I already know that that place is not a Motel 6.

One Response to “Annals of travel”

  1. Dan Says:

    Is this a rather broad hint for a Christmas Present? I expect your yuletide hearth will be filled with decorative bolsters this yer!

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